Roses are red
Violets are blue
Yesterday was Tuesday
But today’s Tuesday, too
there is no one expecting dick to taste good though. i’ve never ever once met a cis dude paranoid about his genitals tasting weird or salty or sweaty or whatever. but of course pussy has to taste like fruit and whatever. OF COURSE.
WHATS THIS MOVIE!?
I WISH I KNEW!!!
The name of this movie is Top Secret
Dude, top secret is such a good movie.
this movie has an entire bar fight sequence that takes place underwater
for no reason at all
next date night movie
I’ll cry at my wedding because it’s a miracle it’s happening
“I was in preschool and a girl actually kissed me on the cheek. I didn’t know what to do. I didn’t know what it meant, so I instantly grabbed her face and kissed her on the lips. And, then I got suspended.”
my grandma is angry at my grandpa because when they went to the doctors the lady asked what he was allergic to and he said his wife
I’d just like to point out that 50 Shades of Grey was Twilight fanfic and Twilight was inspired by Muse so when you think about it, it’s kinda because of Muse that 50 Shades was written in the first place oh
And Muse came from England which traces its roots back to the Anglo-Saxons and Romans, so really, in the end, Julius Caesar wrote 50 Shades of Grey.
someone should totally just stab caesar